Chapter 3

Dad’s house smelled the same as it always had.
Lemon polish.
Old books.
Coffee and vanilla.
The smell of my childhood.
The smell of safety.
He led me straight to my old bedroom.
The one I’d grown up in, walls still covered in faded band posters, the comforter still the soft blue one I’d picked out when I was 14.
It was like stepping back into a time before the bruises, before the lies, before I’d learned to walk on eggshells in my own home.
“Make yourself comfortable,” he said, hovering in the doorway like he was scared to leave me alone. “I’ll get you some water. And the mango sticky rice. It’s still cold.”
I nodded.
I couldn’t speak.
My throat was too tight, my chest too full of all the things I hadn’t said, all the things I’d buried for so long.
He left, closing the door softly behind him.
I sat down on the bed.
The mattress dipped under me, familiar, and for a second I was 10 years old again, hiding here after a bad dream, waiting for dad to come chase the monsters away.
I pulled my sleeves up.
Stared at the bruises on my arms.
The purple ones on my left wrist, still tender.
The yellow ones on my right, almost gone, already being replaced by new ones I’d hidden even better.
I traced a finger over the fingerprint marks.
I remembered exactly when each one had happened.
Two weeks ago.
I’d forgotten to pick up his dry cleaning on the way home from work.
He’d grabbed my wrist so hard I’d dropped my bag, screamed at me for being stupid, for useless, for making him look bad in front of his friends.
I’d apologized for an hour before he’d let me go to bed.
Last month.
I’d answered my phone when my mom called during the football game.
He’d shoved me into the doorframe so hard my shoulder had bruised for three weeks.
I’d told my mom I’d fallen off a ladder.
She’d believed me.
Everyone had.
The first time.
Six months into our marriage.
We’d had a fight about money.
He’d slapped me so hard my lip split.
I’d stared at the blood on my hand, shocked, and he’d cried, held me, said he was sorry, said he’d never do it again, said he was just stressed.
I’d believed him.
I’d wanted to believe him so bad.
I’d thought love was supposed to be hard.
I’d thought if I was better, if I tried harder, if I loved him enough, he’d change.
I’d been so stupid.
So ashamed.
So scared of what people would say—of being the girl who got divorced, the girl who picked the wrong man, the girl who failed—that I’d let it happen over and over and over again.
The door creaked open.
Dad came in, holding a glass of water and the container of mango sticky rice, a spoon tucked under his arm.
He set them on the nightstand next to me.
Sat down on the edge of the bed, far enough to give me space, close enough that I knew he was there.
“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” he said, quiet. “Not now. Not ever, if you don’t. But I’m here. Whenever you’re ready. I’m not going anywhere.”
That’s when I broke.
All the tears I’d held back for months, all the pain, all the shame, all the fear—they came pouring out of me like a flood.
I sobbed so hard I could barely breathe, my body shaking, my hands clutching the comforter like it was the only thing holding me together.
Dad didn’t say anything.
He just moved closer, wrapped his arms around me, and held me.
Rocked me back and forth, slow, like he did when I was little and I’d fallen and scraped my knee.
I felt his shoulders shake too.
Felt his tears drop into my hair.
“I’m sorry,” I kept saying, over and over, into his shirt. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I’m sorry I was so stupid. I’m sorry—”
“Shhh,” he said, his voice thick. “Stop. You have nothing to be sorry for. Nothing. He’s the one who should be sorry. Not you. Never you.”
He held me till I stopped crying.
Till my sobs turned to hiccups, till my body went limp with exhaustion.
Then he pulled back, wiped my face with his sleeve, and handed me the spoon.
“Eat,” he said. “It’s your favorite. Still sweet. Still cold.”
I took the spoon.
Ate a bite of mango sticky rice.
The sugar burst on my tongue, familiar, perfect, and for a second I could breathe again.
“I’ll tell you everything,” I said, my voice hoarse. “All of it. If you want to hear.”
Dad nodded.
He took my hand in his.
Squeezed.
“I want to hear it all,” he said. “Every last thing. And then we’re going to make sure he never hurts you again. I promise you that, baby. On my life.”
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I believed him.
For the first time in a long time, I believed something good was going to happen.